Something thick is in my head. I’m having trouble moving forward. Everything that I want to do is either too easy or too hard. So until I figure out how to get past that, I’ll keep blogging. It’s not like I ever thought I could stop…
Bigots always seem to think that because they cast aspersions on an entire group of people, they are somehow better than people who call out individuals. I’ve gotten into some pretty intense arguments in my life, but few compare to one I had recently over Facebook in which a friend’s grandmother called Obama supporters “minions”. When I protested, at least three or four people dogpiled on top of me, telling me that I shouldn’t talk to her like that. One of them even called me a “little dork piece of shit” and added that I should “learn some manners”. Say that in one breath. If your head doesn’t explode, congratulations, you’re a Republican. If that were the only thing that bugged me, it would be no different from everything that happens on Fox News, but then some other douchebag entered the conversation just to let all of us know that it’s pointless to have political discussions on Facebook. Why? I’m a writer. If I can communicate through blog and email, why not Facebook? And did someone ever explain to this moron that telling others not to argue is an argument all by itself?!?!?!?!?! I’m sorry to get so worked up over this, but I honestly can’t remember the last time I’ve received a response this vituperative for what amounts to a small disagreement. To a bigot, I suppose, there is no such thing as a small disagreement.
If you’re going to commit to something, commit to it. Don’t say that you’re above it all while still stealing a piece for yourself. Facebook, as far as I am concerned, is whatever its users make of it. If we want to have political discussions all day, we can do so. If we want to exchange videos of kittens playing keyboards, we can do that as well. It is sheer arrogance to think that you have the right to lecture somebody else on what they shouldn’t say on the Internet, especially when YOU’RE DOING THAT AS WELL. I’m not sure I can even process that level of cognitive dissonance. The aforementioned dickhole even told me I was “hiding behind” my keyboard. What the fuck did he type that on? Does he communicate with his computer telepathically? When you’re that pompous and backwards-thinking, you can rationalize virtually anything, leaving the rest of us to deal with your douchebaggery. Some people don’t care about making sense. They just want to have the last word. But I always have the last word. Always.
I find that how I sleep tends to set a pattern for how the day goes. It’s not always like that, but sometimes I spend the first few hours tossing and turning, then spend the next morning dicking around. It’s not unalterable, as I slept not at all one night several weeks ago and had a very productive day following that. My therapist would probably say that that means that I have the power to shape my own destiny. I know. I just wish it wasn’t so hard.
Here’s an experiment: If you are a guy, go up to someone you know only a little and ask them what they did with their weekend. When they’re done, say, “I had the best weekend! I won the Nobel Peace Prize, walked on the moon, and hung out with my boyfriend!” If their response isn’t, “Oh, you have a boyfriend?”, find me and I’ll give you $1,000.
Update: I am still awesome. As evidence, I submit the fact that I still have not listened to or seen “Gangnam Style”. Or “Friday”, for that matter. I still can’t get rid of Facebook, though.
While I’m on the topic of a hero’s journey, I’d like to talk about Lord of the Rings. Specifically, I’d like to talk about Frodo. I think he’s one of the most under-appreciated characters in the trilogy. Sam is, in many ways, the true hero of the story, carrying Frodo when he can’t go any further and eventually biting the ring off of his finger after he has succumbed to temptation. This is in stark contrast to, say, the arc followed by Harry Potter or Luke Skywalker. Both of them get to defeat their personal demons in addition to saving the world. After taking the Ring to Mount Doom, Frodo sort of just…fades away. He’s exactly the opposite of a Gary Stu, in that there is no prophesy that foretells his coming and no beautiful elf maiden for him to fall in love with. Unlike in some crass imitators (*cough cough* Eragon), Frodo doesn’t get everything handed to him on a silver platter. He works very hard and gives up basically everything he has just to fail in his mission at the last moment. If that’s not heroism, I don’t know what is.
I think it’s a very hateful thing to tell somebody else that they aren’t bad, just misguided. It essentially puts them on a level at which nothing they say or do matters, because they’re just a victim of society. I am nobody’s victim. When I was in Catholic school, I hated being told by self-righteous believers that there is no point in being a good person unless you have God to tell you what to do. I shudder to think of what would happen if I could prove to these people that God does not exist. Besides, I didn’t realize that universal love and mutual respect are meaningless concepts without Bronze Age myths to back them up. That’s news to me all right. I failed a quiz a week or two ago, performing so badly that I may as well have not shown up at all. When the professor asked me to see her, I told her that I was coming along, but that she should really grade more generously. “I tried,” she said. No, you didn’t. I answered several questions correctly, but received no credit because my answers weren’t precise enough or were immediately contradicted by what followed. That’s better than nothing, even if it isn’t much. It was a short-answer quiz, but she graded it like it was multiple choice. I cannot get far with people who will not meet me halfway. Sooner or later, they have to recognize that I can think for myself.
One more thing: Obama did not lose that debate. It’s not his fault that he showed up expecting his opponent to be polite and respectful, then had to stand there appearing dignified while Romney repeated the same lies that have already been debunked time and time again and talked over the moderator. I’m a very aggressive debater, and even I was taken aback. Cut him some slack, everyone (you too, Jon Stewart.) At least his answers made sense.