Someone to Watch Over Me

I’ve been told by a great many people that I have good instincts. Of course, the instant I start to rely on them, I fail miserably, so I’ve learned to take that compliment in stride.

In a way, it’s silly for me to say that I’ve fallen behind in my classes, as I was never really in stride to begin with. Part of it was my lack of background in economics, policy analysis, and environmental science, but part of it is the simple fact that the sort of work that we do in my program fits into a very narrow mold. Essentially, they’re trying to train us to explain abstract academic concepts to laymen, and since I am a layman in many respects, it’s kind of difficult for me to approach that relationship from the other direction. Seriously, I’m a writer. When I was a child, I would have described myself as more math and science that humanities, but somewhere along the line, I flipped. I’m trying to flip back, but even that wouldn’t solve all of my problems. The classes I took in high school aren’t much like the ones I’m in right now. I am, quite simply, in unfamiliar territory, and maybe there are others who feel the same way, but man, I think others are catching on faster than I am.

A writer I respect said that what sucks about being in your teens/early twenties is the feeling that everybody has it figured out except you. Of course, once you learn to look past your own insecurities, you realize that other people are dealing with similar problems, but I’m in far too pissy of a mood to write something inspirational, so fuck that. Right now, I want to talk about how everyone else is inferior to me. Yes, everyone, with the possible exception of the Joss, who made an endorsement so persuasive that I changed my vote to Romney this Tuesday.

As a left-wing blogger, I am contractually obligated to say something about the elections. But really, what is there to say that hasn’t already been said? Rachel Maddow offered a righteous beatdown shortly after the results were in, so as far as I’m concerned, the only way that things could have possibly gone any better would be if Michele Bachmann–she of the batshit insane photogenic bigotry–hadn’t narrowly won reelection. God, I hate that woman.

What I will say about this election (that seems to be a topic of debate amongst my pinko Commie brethren) is that gloating is acceptable, so long as we keep it good-natured. Yes, modern conservatism is nothing more than a front for a bigoted, us vs. them mentality that is, at times, scarcely even coherent, let alone representative of the founding principles of this country, but there are smart and well-meaning people who voted for Romney. I’m not going to say that they’re misguided or naive, only that they haven’t accepted that the America that the Republican party has spent the last few decades trying to preserve even as it slips farther and farther away is no long relevant. I know, it’s scary–if we can’t have a nation run by rich, straight, Christian white dudes, then who are we, really, as a people? It is a leap of faith to let go of one’s preconceived notions and try to forge one’s own path for a change. No snark there; seriously, it’s fucking terrifying.

Regular readers (I’ve got a couple, right?) or people who know me might remember that I was kicked out of my apartment less than 24 hours after arriving in New York for no reason other than that my roommate didn’t like me. My first thought after that happened was that if I’d known that was going to occur the previous morning, I wouldn’t have gotten on the plane. But if I’d known that all of the other shit that has happened over the past five months-plus was going to happen, I might have. Might.

A few months ago, I made a joke about Swedish gay donkey porn. Since then, “donkey porn” has become the second most popular search item leading people to my blog, finishing behind Luke Skywalker and ahead of Tom Daley, Taylor Lautner, and whatever else I’m masturbating to this week. For some reason, nobody ever searches for Swedish porn. I’m surprised. I thought watching some nubile young blond get ass-pounded by an ass (get it?) would be pretty high up in most peoples’ lists of turn-ons. (Not mine, obviously. I’m just surmising…) This has nothing to do with anything else in this post, but I feel it needs to be said: if you came here for the donkey porn, please leave. Please.

If you supported Mitt Romney for the presidency, please think long and hard about why you did so. Did you agree with his positions, ever-changing as they were, or did you just like what he represents? What’s different about Barack Obama. For the record, I don’t think racism solely explains the trenchant attacks that he has suffered for the past four years. He may be soft-spoken and moderate, but Obama is as relentlessly driven towards making Americans wake up and take stock of their lives as anyone I’ve ever seen. He loves the whole country, not just the one that now exists only in Sean Hannity’s dreams. And some Republicans are reaching out to him. Let us hope that more join them. America has turned its back on a certain segment of the population, but it’s still America.


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