Sometimes

trenzaloreI have a disorganized mind. I feel like I’m always tired. I’m not sure why. At work, my coworkers and my manager are constantly correcting me on stuff. Thing is, I usually figure out my mistake…one second after I make it. So I don’t really need what I just did wrong explained to me. But I feel awkward saying that. So I stand there and nod. I still am not on bar, which is a bit of a problem for a guy who’s been working at a coffee shop for almost two months. Every day, I show up and do whatever they tell me to. So I guess the fact that they haven’t gotten around to training me on that stuff is more a function of my getting stuck at the cash register all the time than anything else. I just feel awkward all the time.

Someone is bound to ask me what I thought of “The Day of the Doctor”, so I’ll just say this: It sucked. The Tom Baker cameo was inspired and God knows Steven Moffat has a gift for writing snappy one-liners, but the plot was basically a feature-length retcon. Defenders will argue that since the 10th Doctor and the War Doctor go back to their own lives unable to remember that they actually did manage to avoid wiping out their own race, stuff really has changed, but that just seems like a way to have your cake and eat it, too. The message of the 50th Anniversary Special, as far as I can tell, is that no matter how big your mistake was, you can always go back in time and fix it. That is a deeply cynical message–dangerous, even. So if you think I’m just some grouch who hates anything even remotely optimistic, ask yourself why I’m such a bad guy for asking people to face the fact that sometimes, life just sucks. Moffat’s storylines tend to be well-constructed, but leave me disengaged. This one was no different.

And one more thing: How exactly does wiping the memories of both the humans and the Zygons help them negotiate a peace treaty? That only works if both sides are a little bit right and a little bit wrong. But they weren’t: The Zygons invaded unprovoked. That means they need to get the fuck off planet Earth and never come back. I suppose you could argue that whatshername was wrong to threaten to blow up London, too, but that’s just false equivalency bullshit. As always, Moffat’s solution to the conflict is, essentially, to avoid it. Forgive me if I find that unconvincing.

I’m searching for words to explain why I still butt heads with other nerds over shit like this, and I think the answer is this: prejudice. I know I’m not the only one who felt this way about “The Day of the Doctor”, but voice that opinion on some of the message boards out there and you will be laughed out of the room. Is it so hard for the fans of the current series to admit that maybe there are contrary opinions out there? No, because if you disagree, you’re the bad guy. At a certain point, it’s useless to argue with people, because they see whatever they want to see. One person mocked me for saying that the Doctor’s actions in the special had no consequence because he’s still bound for Trenzalore, same as he was before. Um…how the fuck is that a consequence? If everything’s exactly the same as it was an hour ago, then nothing has changed. That’s exactly the opposite of a consequence.

A lot of people think they are defending change when they are actually just defending the status quo. There’s one gay couple on YouTube that I tend to follow closely, but have found myself getting bored with as of late. Sure, I would welcome the chance to hang out with them; I just don’t understand why they are so anxious to make themselves an icon of modern gay life. It takes remarkable humility to let the public see the mundane (actually, surprisingly interesting) details of your day-to-day life, but also a hint of self-satisfaction. You might change some folks’ minds, and that’s a good thing, but any progress that you make is dependent on your life and relationship staying healthy. I’ve watched a lot of Will and RJ’s videos, but I still don’t know what they look like when they’re at their worst. That’s a problem, albeit one that it took me a while to tease out.

At a certain point, I don’t see a distinction between rewriting history and rewriting history but making sure nobody knows you rewrote history. The 9th Doctor’s character was defined by the tragedy of seeing his entire race get wiped out in the Time War. If you’re going to have the 11th Doctor go back in time and prevent that from happening, why not have him prevent the assassination of Abraham Lincoln or JFK? Why not just have him prevent every bad thing that has ever happened, ever? If you set up a universe in which anything can be changed at any time, then nothing has any meaning, and the whole thing is pointless. I don’t give a shit that he won’t remember that he rewrote history until he regenerates twice. It’s a copout. Moffat wants to change some things, but have everything else stay the same. It’s too convenient. Life doesn’t work that way. And neither does science fiction.

I guess what’s giving me such a hard time these days is that people want an explanation out of me, and sometimes, I don’t know why I did what I just did. But I’m not going to apologize for it, nor will I apologize for saying that there is something wrong with somebody else’s opinion. You can disagree with me, ignore me, or call me a bigot. But I remain unconvinced.

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